Starting to feel the pressure

I finally finished my essay at nearly 10pm, despite working on it all day. And even now I'm still doubting what I actually wrote about the construction of the piece. Not a good feeling. Well, there's nothing more I can do now except keep reading it to check for any errors. I think a first class is going to be out of my league but I really hope I can at least get a IIi, though anything IIii and above will be accepted with a sigh of relief. I'll just feel a bit 不服 if this module pulls down my overall grade. Hopefully it won't...

It's just like uni to have all the deadlines and important events happening within the same time frame. Submit essay on Monday, submit assignment on Tuesday, and play for someone's performance next Thursday. It's also just like me to have been slacking all this while until everything crashes down on me. Then only do I start to panic and slog like a slave.

It comes as no surprise then, that I haven't finished the assignment due Tuesday, haven't practised for a practical lesson tomorrow, haven't practised for a rehearsal on Tuesday with the person I'm playing for, haven't practised for another practical lesson on coming Thursday, and most importantly, don't think I'm going to be ready for the actual performance next Thursday.

It's one thing to screw up for your own performance and another to screw up while playing for someone else's... the latter shows that you are 100% irresponsible for accepting a performance you're not capable of doing, and will definitely decrease your chances of playing for anyone else, especially if they heard you at the performance, by 100%. I'm wondering if I shouldn't have agreed to play... given that it was quite short notice and she only gave me the score last Thursday as well. That's two weeks before the performance! But I guess I'm in no position to complain, if I agreed I'm expected to be able to learn the pieces well and do it quick, right?

Looks like it's going to be a long week and a half ahead...